Creating Space

I went to a ‘gathering’ last weekend. Organised by Spring Harvest and Sophia Network it was a meeting up of women from all kinds of backgrounds who want to see women released to be all that they were created to be. I took along two of my own little women who, as they played on the iPad and read Little House on the Prairie quietly in the corner, got to hear women talking about how we could help little girls, just like them and maybe older, to dream big dreams and fly.


There's been something buzzing around my head since I left:  We talked about making space for people, thought about how we can make sure that we don’t get so protective of our own positions that we don’t empower other women. We faced up to the fact that it can be hard to step aside and allow room for competition and were tasked with thinking in groups about how we can create pathways for those who come after us.



It was a crucial thing to discuss but, in my group it became apparent that some felt a constant tension in their life at work. Not knowing how to create space or whether they should step down from their role or go part time so someone else gets a chance. It’s been going round in my brain since.


I think it's really important to recognise potential in people and encourage it, to mentor that person and help them take opportunities, to make sure that we don't do things out of selfish ambition BUT I don't think that means everyone has to fall on their sword after a couple of years and retire early or change jobs so that other people get the chance.


I think that the whole thing about church - if that's what we're talking about - should be about creating new space - our aim, to coin a phrase, is expansion. That should need more leaders, not just a quick turn around.


I think that in all our talk about not being selfish with our space - which is totally correct - we must be careful we don't end up feeling guilty that we have a space in the first place. Jesus handed over his task to the disciples at 33 because he had finished. At 33 most of us are just starting. And he handed over to 12, not just because they weren't actually the son of God and it would take 12 of them to do what he did but because they had to go to the ends of the earth. They led until they died, but they appointed and annointed new leaders (male and female) as they grew the church. They created space through evangelism and the simple need for more leaders. 


So I think creating space is about creating vision - saying - what Tearfund, Spring Harvest, Schoolswork etc do is great, lets do more. Leading churches is great - lets start new ones, speaking on a platform is important - go to the ends of the earth and speak to people who have never heard the news before. It’s about seeing our role, not as the destination but as the springboard for new projects with new people. 

The crucial thing is enabling women to dare to have vision in the first place and the courage to see it through. We still have to challenge bad theology and traditions and I personally think quotas have a place, but throughout history, bold women have gone and done the things men told them they couldn't and they have done them so well people noticed.

As a brethren girl myself, I was struck by how many women in the room yesterday were from the same background - who had grown up being told they couldn't but who did it anyway. Let's raise a generation of bold women with big dreams and empower them to turn those dreams into reality.

A bit inappropriate?

Liberti editor Rebekah Legg is travelling to Haiti on behalf of Spring Harvest this Sunday to visit various church projects sponsored by Compassion. Bekah be keeping us up to date with her trip here:

I got my travel pack in the post today; all the instructions I need for my trip to Haiti. I was so excited I could have squealed.

But then I wasn't sure if I should be excited. After all I’m travelling to a disaster zone, a place that had been decimated by dictators and weather systems, poverty and sickness long before the biggest earthquake in two centuries hit. Is it right to be excited, or does that make me wrong? A bit inappropriate? How are you meant to feel about flying into poverty, meeting people who are struggling to get through each day, kids whose major achievement to date is survival?

But I am excited: excited that I have the privilege of visiting projects that are changing lives; saving lives. Excited about seeing the church in motion, the church living up to its name, being light in the darkness and a force for good in a land that is broken.

I sat down with a mug of tea to read my pack; learned a few little bits of Creole; it’s a bit like French, I think I can pull it off. I learned how to make sure I don’t commit any social faux pas and I checked out what to wear. My excitement left me in a rush: I have nothing to wear. It feels ridiculous that I should say such a thing, but it’s actually true.

I had anticipated a bit of decency being necessary and was, I thought, ahead of the game. It’s going to be hot, but I know my little summer dresses would probably be considered scandalous so I’d borrowed some cropped trousers from my mum as my two pairs are either white (asking for trouble) or falling apart (you can see my underwear- definitely scandalous).  So I thought, Mum to the rescue, a few borrowed pairs of decent trousers would do trick.

But now, the travel guide says trousers are a no-no for women as are shorts, I have to wear long skirts and hide my cleavage. I may have to cut holes in my duvet cover and wear that as a shroud as a close inspection of my wardrobe reveals a large lack of long skirts and an abundance of now embarrassingly low cut tops. My entire wardrobe is inappropriate. I am have a clothing crisis the like of which I have not experienced since a last minute invitation to a posh function caught me a stone heavier than my one smart frock allowed. All in all I went into a spin and headed for the internet to see if I could find something decent to wear – in every sense of that word.

And then I stopped; because if anything seems inappropriate in this situation it’s spending money on clothes. I’m flying to a country where 54% of people live on less than a dollar a day. Having lived in Kenya I can picture the markets where they find their clothes. We used to call them bend over boutiques – huge piles of clothes discarded by the West but treasured in the developing world – a business for some and a provision for those who otherwise really would have nothing to wear.

It’s made me think about how I use the money God has granted me. It’s made me think about the call God has on my life and I’ve remembered that for me that’s not to be a fashion emissary to the developing world (or anywhere for that matter as my daughters would tell you).

I’ve decided this isn’t an excuse to expand my wardrobe with inappropriately expensive and unnecessary items; I’ve rung around my mates and borrowed some bits and dug out some old things I’d forgotten I had. I’ve some odd combinations, but I don’t think my hosts will care and the important thing is that they know how honoured and delighted I am to meet them. That's appropriate, that's exciting; I can’t wait.

Do I have to go to church?

I remember having days as a kid when the thought of going to church was more than I could bear. My mum had very fixed ideas about what was expected of us on Sundays.

I always had to wear a flouncy dress and my older brother was forced to wear his smartest clobber (well at least, he was until his best trousers were worn out from skimming along the shiny floors on his knees).

While other parents brought colouring books and toys for their children to play with, we were expected to sit quietly until Sunday School was announced, whenever we weren’t being called on to sing, stand or help out in some way.

My brother and I responded differently to this strict regime. He decided, aged 13 or so, that he had done his time and would not be going back to church. No amount of ordering, pleading or bribery would change his mind. He still only ever crosses the threshold for weddings, and even then it is with great reluctance.

I, on the other hand, decided to embrace church life wholeheartedly. I landed the lead in most of the church plays (I had a big mouth even then) and was eager to participate at Sunday school. I made some great friends, who I still adore, and spent a great deal of time in youth meetings, at Christian camps and just hanging around the church between services.

This didn’t make me any better than my brother. Although I had committed my life to God, the level of commitment fluctuated considerably. On Sunday I could be praising my creator with all my heart, hands lifted and in full voice, but by Monday I could be smoking and swearing heartily with my school friends.

I did eventually realise that this wasn’t sustainable and, while I’ve moved churches several times since (for geographical reasons), my faith is now firmly rooted. I still make lots of mistakes, of course, but I no longer live a double life.

Sadly, a lot of the friends I made in those early days of church no longer have any time for ‘religion’. Several have wandered away and become embroiled in some pretty sticky situations.

So what can we do to keep the younger generation on the right path? We know that nagging doesn’t work, so what is the answer? Are we right to intervene if our children decide they no longer want to ‘do church’?

I’d answer the last question with an emphatic yes, and I’m pretty sure Care for the Family would agree. The organisation has launched a national tour designed to address (and counter), the issues that prompt children and teenagers to leave church behind.

This tour forms part of the “Getting Your Kids Through Church Without Them Ending Up Hating God” initiative Care for the Family launched at Spring Harvest 2011. The organisation has teamed up with several others including Youth for Christ, Scripture Union, Spring Harvest and Urban Saints to put an end to this sad trend. 

Visiting six venues across the UK in November, the tour will encourage parents, church leaders and youth workers to explore practical ways to save a generation of young people from feeling ostracised by the church.

The main speaker at these events will be Rob Parsons, the charity’s founder. He will reflect on the concept of the ‘perfect Christian child mould’ and will outline what he describes as the ‘Big Five killers of young faith’. Christian band Phatfish and the Saltmine Theatre Company will also take to the stage.

Tickets cost between £9 and £14 and are available for the following venues:

The Sage, Gateshead, on November 1 

The Clyde Auditorium, Glasgow, on November 2

The Waterfront Hall, Belfast, on November 3

The Corn Exchange, Cambridge, on November 22

The Hexagon, Reading, on November 23

The Colston Hall, Bristol, on November 24

Visit www.gyktc.org.uk to find out more and read more from Joy in the upcoming issue of Liberti.