I remember having days as a kid when the thought of going to church was more than I could bear. My mum had very fixed ideas about what was expected of us on Sundays.
I always had to wear a flouncy dress and my older brother was forced to wear his smartest clobber (well at least, he was until his best trousers were worn out from skimming along the shiny floors on his knees).
While other parents brought colouring books and toys for their children to play with, we were expected to sit quietly until Sunday School was announced, whenever we weren’t being called on to sing, stand or help out in some way.
My brother and I responded differently to this strict regime. He decided, aged 13 or so, that he had done his time and would not be going back to church. No amount of ordering, pleading or bribery would change his mind. He still only ever crosses the threshold for weddings, and even then it is with great reluctance.
I, on the other hand, decided to embrace church life wholeheartedly. I landed the lead in most of the church plays (I had a big mouth even then) and was eager to participate at Sunday school. I made some great friends, who I still adore, and spent a great deal of time in youth meetings, at Christian camps and just hanging around the church between services.
This didn’t make me any better than my brother. Although I had committed my life to God, the level of commitment fluctuated considerably. On Sunday I could be praising my creator with all my heart, hands lifted and in full voice, but by Monday I could be smoking and swearing heartily with my school friends.
I did eventually realise that this wasn’t sustainable and, while I’ve moved churches several times since (for geographical reasons), my faith is now firmly rooted. I still make lots of mistakes, of course, but I no longer live a double life.
Sadly, a lot of the friends I made in those early days of church no longer have any time for ‘religion’. Several have wandered away and become embroiled in some pretty sticky situations.
So what can we do to keep the younger generation on the right path? We know that nagging doesn’t work, so what is the answer? Are we right to intervene if our children decide they no longer want to ‘do church’?
I’d answer the last question with an emphatic yes, and I’m pretty sure Care for the Family would agree. The organisation has launched a national tour designed to address (and counter), the issues that prompt children and teenagers to leave church behind.
This tour forms part of the “Getting Your Kids Through Church Without Them Ending Up Hating God” initiative Care for the Family launched at Spring Harvest 2011. The organisation has teamed up with several others including Youth for Christ, Scripture Union, Spring Harvest and Urban Saints to put an end to this sad trend.
Visiting six venues across the UK in November, the tour will encourage parents, church leaders and youth workers to explore practical ways to save a generation of young people from feeling ostracised by the church.
The main speaker at these events will be Rob Parsons, the charity’s founder. He will reflect on the concept of the ‘perfect Christian child mould’ and will outline what he describes as the ‘Big Five killers of young faith’. Christian band Phatfish and the Saltmine Theatre Company will also take to the stage.
Tickets cost between £9 and £14 and are available for the following venues:
The Sage, Gateshead, on November 1
The Clyde Auditorium, Glasgow, on November 2
The Waterfront Hall, Belfast, on November 3
The Corn Exchange, Cambridge, on November 22
The Hexagon, Reading, on November 23
The Colston Hall, Bristol, on November 24
Visit www.gyktc.org.uk to find out more and read more from Joy in the upcoming issue of Liberti.
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